When Fear Cripples

 

Any homeschooling mom will tell you that fear has hindered her from making the right choice at least once in her homeschooling journey. The lies come in from naysayers, well-meaning family members, social media, and even our own minds—leading us to doubt and ultimately towards making fear-based decisions. As resilient as we are, we bounce back after finding support from other homeschooling moms, our spouse, and most importantly the Lord.  

What about when we don't?

What about when fear cripples us?

What about when we stay in the place of doubt, fear, and confusion because it seems like we are in a dark room—grasping into nothingness—not knowing what is right in front of us?

I want to talk about when Jesus was sleeping in the boat while the disciples were fearful and how that can help us today. Before I do, I will address several unhealthy ways to approach fear. 

Ways that are just as crippling as fear itself. 

If you are attempting to battle fear using the following methods—there is a better way. An effective way. Not a formula, but a practical way to deal with fear biblically. 

Unhealthy Ways to Deal with Fear

1. Rebuking Fear

The modern-day "speak it into existence" way to deal with fear is found predominantly in the New Age but did you know that it has crept into the church? Many misuse the Bible verse that mentions how life and death are in the power of the tongue approaching fear by simply talking to it. Is fear an entity that we can speak to? If we begin to speak to fear what is next? Lying? Lust? Pride? These are all sins that we are to repent of when they come up as a believer. A heart of repentance is actually what the Lord seeks (Psalm 51:17). When we begin yelling, rebuking, declaring, and decreeing that fear will not have a foothold in our lives, I would say THAT is based more on fear than humbly asking the Lord for help in that area. The Bible tells us over and over again not to fear. Therefore, when we do, we are disobeying God. Our response? Repent and ask for His help, strength, and wisdom to teach us how to walk that out. 

2. Casting Out the Spirit of Fear

1 John 4:18 says that there is no fear in love but that perfect love casts out fear. Additionally, the term "spirit of fear" is referenced in 2 Timothy 1:7. These verses have been misrepresented by many causing some to believe that removing fear from your life is as simple as "casting it out," in the same way that Jesus and the disciples cast out devils in the New Testament. These verses are in no way implying that and I will explain below how I believe the love of Jesus helps us to overcome fear when we are in the midst of it. 

If someone lays hands on you to cast out the spirit of fear, you will be sorely disappointed when fear comes back, causing you to doubt your experience and doubt your faith. This is not a biblical practice and is harmful to the church. Simply put, this teaching makes it seem like it is a "one and done" event and if fear comes back, it is because the believer has sinned—a works-based message. It also implies that a spirit other than the Holy Spirit can dwell within a believer. 

3. Hiding From It

If fear has come your way and you hid, you are not alone. Adam and Eve did the same thing in the garden. That said, we are missing out on so much when we hide due to fear. The Lord can have wonderful plans in store for us and when we shrink back and hide the person we hurt the most is ourself. 

4. Blaming Others

Again, this too dates back to the garden and it is so easy to do. When fear hinders us from doing the right thing or moving forward blaming others gives us a temporary sense of relief. Relief from the uncomfortable feelings that fear produces is what we are ultimately looking for. When we realize that the Lord can and will help us through those uncomfortable times, we are less apt to blame others and see the situation at hand more clearly. 

So How Should We Deal with Fear?

 

We walk through it. 

We do not run. We do not hide. We do not blame others. We ignore unbiblical methods of addressing it and we walk through it—with the Lord. 

We allow ourselves to experience the uncomfortable feelings and realize that we were never promised a warm and fuzzy feeling every single moment of our lives. We don't pray until we feel good. We pray asking the Lord to forgive us for fearing. For doubting His goodness. His sovereignty. Then we walk through the trial with Him knowing that He is with us.  

Maybe the still waters and green pastures in Psalm 23 won't come for another few weeks, years, or decades, and we have to be okay with that. His peace can be with you in the midst of difficult times. Psalm 23:4 says that He is with us. Yes, He will lead us out, but until then, we need to trust that He is there in the middle of the chaos. In that exact moment that we are fearful. As we understand that we can keep walking and before we know it, we are on the other side giving all of the glory to Him. 

When the disciples were confused as to why Jesus was sleeping during the storm it was to show us that He is the one at peace and He is the one we need to run to when scared. Like the disciples we will find ourselves fearful at times. Jesus might ask us where our faith is like He asked the disciples (Luke 8:25). The good news is that when we put our faith in Him when fear comes, He will calm the storm in His time. He was there when the boat was rocking and He was there during the calm. Whether the boat is rocking or it is calm for you right now, remember that He is there and is looking for you to have faith in that truth. That is where the true freedom lies.